A new look at My Silver Street.
Hello to the new look of ‘My Silver Street.’ It was time, required and exciting. For those who have just fallen upon the page, or followed for a while, the idea of My Silver Street began five years ago. Let’s just say I found my perfect life, in tatters. All the picket fences were down, the forever home gone, relationships too and so I was on my own, trying to create a new life for myself. Many, many nights of walking in the rain, waiting for the bus, tears as big as light bulbs and fear a constant thumping in my heart. I had failed, been rejected and was deeply flawed. I had to admit that to myself, but for a long time, fear of the unknown, of ‘what was going to happen to me’, how I was going to survive and other dark thoughts haunted each day. Struggling to cope with the being divorced, in a new country, no real career, no true threads to cling to, I had to face the darkest stranger of all, myself.
There is never a good time to be alone, or start again. Sometimes it is forced upon us, and times of our own making, but then, as has been said before, it is how you deal with it. I failed miserably to rise to the challenge for a while, opting instead to wail to all who would hear, make rash and childish decisions and veer heedlessly from one experience to another, drinking copious amounts of wine and letting myself go. Of course it was grief, a desperate kind of grief - I know that now, at the time it was just a loss of the love and lifestyle I knew, and it has taken me years to accept that and move on.
Not just move on, but thrive, and that is what My Silver Street is all about today. I cannot deny that the hours of blogging in pain and disbelief, facing lawyers and looking for work whilst trying to establish a new life, has not been therapeutic, in a rather weird way, but when one has fallen rather far, you notice things about the world, and yourself, and to rise, stronger, hopefully wiser and kinder, is a gift.
It has been amazing. Being able to vent my feelings out loud, resonated with so many others who found themselves lost and alone, or just redundant and frightened in the Silver part of their lives. It has been overwhelming to think that for so many, the building up of lives, careers, families and communities, sort of fell away … where did it go?
Being able to work through these situations, in writing, has shifted the subjective to the objective and looking back, I am actually both horrified and proud of some of the pieces I wrote - but no regrets and I shall post some of the earlier ones later on this new baby website. I always encourage others to write, put it down, from the heart to the page - best advice I was given.
The past five years has seen me work a number of different jobs, retrain in some of them, move house a few times, turn sixty and learn to live comfortably with myself, looking forward to the many experiences and challenges, and to travel, write and never give up again. I will share of the amusing attempts at being a waitron in a busy London cafe, sobbing beside the Seine, learning dates and shoving them into the foggy brain on my first few walking tours, and the eternal struggle of where I should actually live.
When I say I want to simplify my life, it is anything but settle for the small and comfortable. Rather, it means that I have clearer goals, dismiss the fluff, ignore the hysteria and focus on the lovely.
For five years I was trying to manage a website designed by others, managed by others and not really understanding how it all worked. No more, so I have opted for this simple format, designed and controlled by me - and I am still working on it. This is the ideal, to be empowered and make the decisions, the plans and how it affects those I love. A little brave I must add, for technology is something I am not that au fait with, but having said that, I am keen to learn and be part of it all, rather than ‘bah humbug’ and talk of nothing but the good old days.
I am not a sixty-something woman who wants to make jokes about getting old, wearing purple hats and all that, in fact I find it rather insulting to make fun of getting older. My icons are men and women who may have aged physically, but are now stronger and better than than they have ever been, still viable contributors in business, community work, and other interesting fields - entrepreneurs using their experience to teach and explore, and refuse to be put in a bracket that does not fit them well.
The wallowing and terror has, slowly but surely, been replaced by en enthusiasm for life, a strong focus for what I want from it, and how I plan to make these years ones of learning new tricks, more skills, become the business woman I want to be and help others to do the same, through motivation, travel itineraries and support in the good and not so good times.
My Silver Street is two things: A beautiful walk down the road of life and a travel company that believes in mindful travel, solo journeys, friends going together, to places that are rich in history, brimming with culture and deeply romantic in nature.
Did I fail? Spectacularly. Did I recover? Took a while. Have I learnt? Is that a question? Did I get up again … absolutely.
Welcome to the corner of Silver Street.